lizzie reads from tree of codes for your listening pleasure

EVERYONE KNOWS that tree of codes is jonathan safran foer's newest "novel" which is actually a "novella" created from another novel called the street of crocodiles.

it is a DIE-CUT book, as if he took the street of crocodiles and only printed it on one-side of the pages and then literally cut out some of the words to make a whole new story!!!!

(i think i'm going to submit this description here to wikipedia because there is no entry for tree of codes yet and this is so eloquently written.)

it's common knowledge that jonathan safran foer is a creative genius.

in fact everything he's ever written is the most beautiful thing i've ever read. maybe. if not, it's at least a tie for first place.

it took me quite a few tries to figure out how to read this book. first i just tried looking at the pages normally and reading through the holes. but then i realized that duh you need to lift up each page and read the words that remain.

please keep this in mind if you watch the video and are like "lizzie you can't even read wtf"

i mean the punctuation is not always obvious ok

i've probably read it about 5 times all the way through. hope you guys like it

cya

A PRETTY LAME GAME

y'all when i was in hs, my friends would choke each other to pass out on purpose and they were like "THIS IS FUN LIZZIE YOU SHOULD TRY IT. COME ON JUST THIS ONCE"

but i was like "i don't know you guys... it doesn't seem like such a good idea... seems kind of dangerous... i don't really particularly enjoy passing out... it kind of feels like dying..."

but they were like "OMG YOU PASSED OUT FOR LIKE A FULL MINUTE LOL" "OMG I DID? IT ONLY FELT LIKE ONE SECOND LOL! OMG I WAS DREAMING! OMG I WANT TO TRY IT AGAIN"

but as a cautious teenager (a rare breed), i never tried it anyway even though it was SO MUCH FUN.

well believe it or not, i JUST watched a crim minds ep where tEEnS were playing ~*~the choking game~*~ with each other and DYING.

dr. spencer reid called it "a pretty lame game" and everyone knows that he's a genius who solves all the crimes with his superior intelligence.

looks like i was right all along. no surprise there.

crim mindz

if y'all were wondering how much i've been watching criminal minds lately, i'd say an average of two episodes per day

getting so old y'all

since i am now 25 years and 6 days old (ANCIENT), i've been spending a lot of time figuring out what type of old lady i want to become.

here are my options:

the hippest old lady who wears awesome non-old-lady thingz~

an unlikely outcome but there's no telling what the years will bring

i'll take it as a positive sign that i already had this image saved on my computer

da gurlz~

highly probable

right now i'm leaning towards option A, but who knows. i do still have a few years before i need to decide

something important that needs to be posted on the internet duh

listen y'all,

i was just thinking about the somatosensory system and how it's basically the only sense you can't really turn off, and how outrageously disturbing that is.

let's consider the facts:

the five senses are sight, taste, smell, hearing, and touch. duh. everyone knows that.

now let's discuss the ability or inability to lose all of the senses.

it's so easy to stop seeing, all you have to do is close your eyelids! also if it's bright you can still technically see but you can cover your eyelids with something dark and see absolutely nothing. also, it is possible for people to be blind.

it's really difficult to completely turn off your ability to hear. you can use earplugs which mostly block out the outside noise, but you can still hear yourself breathing, your heart beating, your bones cracking, you know, all the things you wouldn't necessarily ever want to hear. let's just say for the sake of argument that you lie completely still in a very quiet place. if you do this you can basically turn off your hearing. it is also possible for people to be deaf.

obv to stop smelling things, all that would be required would be to hold your nose closed. but taste and smell are so closely related, so we'll focus on the sense of taste aka the gustatory sense. this sense can very easily be dulled if you have a cold or some other illness. completely ridding yourself of taste would be so difficult, but LET'S JUST SAY that someone burned off all their tastebuds or like didn't even have a tongue. IT COULD HAPPEN. also once i met someone who claimed they couldn't smell anything ever. in either of these instances, someone could technically be conscious and without a sense of taste and smell.

NOW IS WHERE IT GETS CRAZY.

according to my thoughts and considerations, IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE TO BE CONSCIOUS AND ALIVE AND NOT FEEL ANYTHING AT ALL.

let's consider some potential scenarios. let's say you are somehow floating in the air and there is no wind. you wouldn't be able to blink and you'd have to somehow not touch your tongue to your teeth at all (because you can feel both those things). how would you ever separate your toes without feeling them being separated? okay, let's say you don't have feet. also, you are floating easily and not straining any voluntary muscles, not like it feels to float in water or anything. listen, besides all those things, still involuntary things can happen in your body and you can FEEL them. also, if you were wondering why you were floating in the air and didn't have feet, you would FEEL anxious. PHYSICAL FEELINGS.

also i just googled "people who can't feel" and the only results i got were people who can't feel emotions and people who can't feel pain, which is indeed very interesting but they can still FEEL other things.

this is so wild and crazy. i just can't believe that there is no way to ever stop feeling until you die.

can you be entirely numb? is that possible?

if y'all could possibly think of any scenario that wouldn't involve feeling, please inform me at once. it would bring me peace. thanks.